30 August 2009

Hopefully Turning over a New Leaf

I gave Keane a haircut! I figure I better do it now and learn, while he is not embarrassed.

Keane picked out his winter hat (I gave him a choice between two). We are almost set with his fall and winter clothes. Could do with a few more play clothes and tennis shoes. He has a "problem" with having really wide feet. The cute little ones definitely don't fit him, but the big ones are too long.

Look at that cute little ice cream our neighbor gave him!

I've been pretty lazy lately...who likes to admit that? but there you have it. Oh, it's got nothing to do with blog neglecting, in fact, I started a music one. I've been totally unmotivated to accomplish much. I told John two weeks ago, "I need a vacation." I think subconsciously something kicked in, and couch potato syndrome set in. I've been neglectful and way too interested in temporal things and my poor son... It's the kind of thing you'd rather not examine in yourself, so I tweak my eye and move on. With Christ, there is hope. Hope is Christ, that's all there is to it.

Anyway, now that I've cleared my conscience for the blog world, this new leaf will hopefully look a lot like more dedication to God's truth lived out. The only way to do that is to get into the Word more and more and get back to allowing myself to be built up with "good food". I just want to shout out a warning for any of you gals out there who might be flirting with discouragement and laziness. It comes in all forms or from all forms I should say, but comes out of the same bad heart. A big one for me is dissatisfaction in the daily routine, or not being content where I am. Lord knows I'd rather not be in Germany and I struggle, even with where I am physically living right now. It's on the top floor of our apartment on a hill, with a great view, but it is so HOT, like an oven in the summer. We have to leave all the shudders down and I'm almost never motivated to leave the house- but I have determined to be content where I am. One of the things that motivated me to be content was the disconnect I was feeling.

My husband told me after a pretty significant personal rampage, that I lived in my own world. I thought about that a lot, and I discovered that it was true. Seemed like I was always trying to escape. Escape my son's childishness and constant curiosity that exploits itself in destruction, escape home responsibilities which proved itself in the frequency of FB visits, escape my husband even, with a "good" book at night before I went to sleep with barely a word. What that says all over it is a DISCONTENTMENT.

So on to better days hopefully, with the Lord's help. I'm praying that He shows me continually the eternal worth of investing in my family, where we are, with what we are doing, making the effort to connect with my heart and not wish being somewhere else. I shudder to think of the past, but "...forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus." Phil. 4:13b-14


akhughes said...

these are great thoughts. Don't we all fight the battle of wanting to seclude ourselves sometimes. As a mother though, we don't really have that option! Hope your heart is encouraged & you continue to draw strength from our good God!

(I don't know if you remember me from wed. extension Bible study trips!)

Karis said...

Hmmm... I've been on the great escape recently blaming it on "morning" sickness, but I think I enjoy having that excuse a little too much. Thanks for being transparent with us. I'm going to think on this topic in my own life. I don't want to waste my life!

The little kids song is running through my head, "He's still working on me to make me what I ought to be..." :-)

Wild Ghese said...

I just want to clarify for the literalists out there- I didn't mean abusive neglect- just not spending the time that I should with him, because time is short and I should be redeeming it.